owlmylove:

when i find stretch marks on my thighs i make a point of smooching them because they’re just doing their best at keeping the all-powerful immortal Being within me from ripping my mortal shell asunder in a blaze of heavenly glory and eviscerating the cosmos in my divine wrath

(via rolling-in-the-deep-dish)

colesprouseofficial:

sorry! your password must contain at least seventeen roman numerals and the entire script of shrek the third

(Source: mermeme, via notenuf)

hotboyproblems:

If you read this we’re dating now, no choice.

(Source: hotboyproblems, via adam-rikard)

me when i am mildly inconvenienced: thIS IS THE WORST THING THAT'S EVER HAPPENED TO ME
me when i am legitimately hurt/distressed: no no it's fine i've had worse

newdisaster:

You know, Guardians of the Galaxy was not the first film I’ve watched in which Vin Diesel voiced a character that barely spoke and yet destroyed me with a single line of dialogue

need I remind you

image

(via ruby-brown)